God’s Way Not My Way

The Magician’s Nephew, by C.S. Lewis is a beautiful story that tells of Narnia’s creation and evil entering the newborn world. The story opens with one of the protagonists, Digory, hiding in the garden sobbing his heart out because his mother is dying, his father is far away in the army, and he is living in a strange house with a preoccupied aunt and crazy uncle. In short, Digory’s whole world is falling to pieces before his eyes and he has nothing to cling to in this storm. How familiar is this?

When Digory and his friend, Polly, appear in Narnia with their rag-tag band of interlopers, the beautiful land is unfolding and being created before them. Yet this newborn world is hardly done being created when a witch is unleashed on its purity through series of ill-advised choices made by poor Digory. Evil has now been loosed in this precious land where it was never meant to be.

Digory later approaches the Lion to confess his grave mistake but also to tell Aslan about his dear mother and ask for her to be healed. And something amazing happens:

“Up till then he had been looking at the Lion’s great feet and the huge claws on them; now, in his despair, he looked up at its face. What he saw surprised him as much as anything in his whole life. For the tawny face was bent down near his own and (wonder of wonders) great shining tears stood in the Lion’s eyes. They were such big, bright tears compared to Digory’s own that for a moment he felt as if the Lion must really be sorrier about his Mother than he was himself.” (The Magician’s Nephew)

But instead of helping his mother, Aslan tasks Digory and Polly to travel to a walled garden and pick an apple to protect Narnia from the witch. Digory obeys and makes it to the garden to find the doors wide open and the witch waiting for him inside. There she tempts Digory with taking an apple for himself, telling him that this apple – when brought back to his world, would have the power to heal anything; Digory would have the chance he’d been waiting for: to save his mother from death.

When this plan fails the witch tries another tactic, she asks Digory if Aslan really cared. If he did then he would have told him to take another apple for his dying mother. Surely if he truly cared, he would let him. But in the midst of temptation, Digory remembered the Great Lion’s face and his big, bright tears. Aslan had been sorrier over his mother than Digory had been; he wanted her healed, but Aslan had not told him to pick a second apple.

So Digory denies his deepest desire, returns with only one apple, having refused to pick an apple for himself. He lays his mother at Aslan’s feet and watches mournfully as the silver apple is buried beneath the ground and sprouts into a tree of protection for Narnia. Digory’s last chance to save his mother is now lost, but he had obeyed.

And Aslan did not forgot it. He rewards Digory’s obedience and trust, telling him to pick a healing apple from the newly grown tree and take it to his mother for her healing.

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Have you ever been there? Where the desires of your heart, which might have been honorable and good are outweighed by the influence of God’s desire? Have you ever gone to God for help, having pre-planned what God was allowed to do so that the outcome came out the way you wanted? Because I certainly have.

How many times did I pray to my heavenly Father and in the same breath I use to declare that His ways are higher than mine, I tell Him “I have it figured out, just follow this plan.”

There is often something that is keeping us from accepting God’s way. For me it is my comfort, pride, and aversion to conflict. If God can fix my problem without making me uncomfortable, humiliated, inconvenienced, or without confrontation then I want Him to use that path.

I read somewhere “With our mouths we pray, “Thy will be done.” But with our hearts we hope, “Thy will match mine.” And what, my friends, is our response when it doesn’t, when God’s ways truly are higher than ours?

Our response should be to call to remembrance the promises of God. How many times has God said in the Bible that He is with those who put their whole trust in Him and will work towards their good? Jesus says we are more precious to the Father than the sparrows that He watches over. Like a parent guiding His child to the best thing for them, God is guiding us to what is good for us.

I don’t know about you, but I definitely can’t see as far ahead as God can to determine what is for my benefit. I’ve had to learn how to submit myself to my Heavenly Father’s instructions time and time again as I re-learn how to obey and trust. I lay down the desires of my heart and ask the Lord to replace my desires with His, knowing full well that in the beginning of this process I will mourn in the sowing but eventually rejoice in the reaping.

Nothing about death is fun or enjoyable, and it definitely isn’t when we have to die to our flesh. Yet just like we have the hope of eternal life that makes the sting of death disappear; so we have the hope that whatever God has for us is infinitely more wonderful than we could ever plan.

Where in your life are you facing this temptation? Where is the silver apple being dangled in your face, offering a way to give you your heart’s desire? And what, my friend, is your response going to be?